My Business Advice to Creative Loafing

I can smell the desperation from Creative Loafing. The Tampa alt-weekly sent out this tweet.

Erotic websites for “the thinking set” (photos NSFW): http://is.gd/3QxV5 #sex

Oh my, someone really wants web traffic.

The link goes to a Daily Loaf post that provides links to porn sites and images of nude women. I am trying to figure out what demographic Editor David Warner and online producer Stephen Hammill are trying to reach? How many avant garde art, reality television, environmental conscious, wine drinking, porn loving, Phish fans do they think will visit the blog daily? Do they think there is a cross section of readership equally obsessed with celebrity gossip and the politics behind light rail?

I would like to know how the advertisers are pitching the blog to businesses. People want to market products to readership that would most likely buy their products. For example: an online ad for Gossip Girls on ESPN.com would not reach the proper demographic. Ads for the the new Madden football game would atract both football and gamer fans. I highly doubt the CL marketing people knows who Daily Loaf's targeting audience is.

Hammill is desperately seeking traffic and told staffers quantity (of traffic) is more important than quality. If the quality sucks then don't count on visitors to come back to the site. My advise to Hammill and Warner is quit the false pretense of running a new service and create a real porn site. Countless numbers of entrepreneurs are making a nice living doing this. They can lay off more people and generate a huge quanity of traffic. Multitasking, at it's finest.

Tampa is the East coast capital for porn. Finding talent should not be a difficult task. Hammill and Warner are trying to bring traffic with links to porn sites and nude celebrity photos. People would much rather see real porn on the internet. Turn CL into a giant porn service. Porn sites generate revenue from subscriptions, ad and link clicks to other porn sites. Hammill and Warner will get more ad revenue then they are with the most embarrassing media blog in Florida. No worries about providing health care for employees. Just make sure porn performers get tested for STDs. Or maybe not. It is not like Warner or Hammill will be having sex with the talent. Right?

Now presenting today's Unintentionally Ironic Tweet by Michelle Malkin

I've started following Michelle Malkin on Twitter, and I have noticed that she's a bit more honest in the microblogging format -- whether she means to be or not. Why not make a regular feature out of her sincerity? So today, I present the (in the parlance of our week) inaugural Unintentionally Ironic Tweet by Michelle Malkin:

07:20 1/21/09: "My eyes may be open, but I am not awake yet."

I couldn't have described you better myself, internment queen. Toodles!